Malaysian English=P

Who says our English is teruk? Just see below -

Ours is simple, short, concise,straight-to-point, effective etc:

WHEN GIVING A CUSTOMER BAD NEWS

Britons: I’m sorry, Sir, but we don’t
seem to have the sweater you want in
your size, but if you give me a
moment, I can call the other outlets
for you.

Malaysians: No Stock.

RETURNING A CALL

Britons: Hello, this is John Smith.Did anyone page for me a few moments
ago?

Malaysians: Hello, who page?

ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE WAY

Britons: Excuse me, I’d like to get
by. Would you please make way?

Malaysians: S-kew me

WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS TO PAY

Britons: Hey, put your wallet away,this drink is on me.

Malaysians:No-need, lah.

WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION

Britons: Excuse me, but do you think
it would be possible for me to enter
through this door?

Malaysians: (pointing the door) can ar?

WHEN ENTERTAINING

Britons: Please make yourself right at
home.

Malaysians: Don’t be shy, lah!

WHEN DOUBTING SOMEONE

Britons: I don’t recall you giving me
the money.

Malaysians: Where got?

WHEN DECLINING AN OFFER

Britons: I’d prefer not to do that, if
you don’t mind.

Malaysians: Don’t want la…

IN DISAGREEING ON A TOPIC OF DISCUSSION

Britons: Err. Tom, I have to stop you
there. I understand where you’recoming from, but I really have to
disagree with what you said about the issue.

Malaysians: You mad, ah?

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE TO LOWER THEIRVOICE

Britons: Excuse me, but could you
please lower your voice, I’m trying to
concentrate over here.

Malaysians: Shut up lah!

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE IF HE/SHE KNOWSYOU

Britons: Excuse me, but I noticed you
staring at me for some time.. Do Iknow you?

Malaysians: See what, see what?

WHEN ASSESSING A TIGHT SITUATION

Britons: We seem to be in a bit of apredicament at the moment.

Malaysians: Die-lah!!

WHEN TRYING TO FIND OUT WHAT HADHAPPENED

Britons: Will someone tell me what has
just happened?

Malaysians: Wat happen Why like that….

WHEN SOME ONE DID SOMETHING WRONG

Britons: This isn’t the way to do it,here let me show you,

Malaysians: like that also don’t knowhow to do!!!!

WHEN ONE IS ANGRY

Britons: Would you mind not disturbing me

Malaysians: Celaka u